The One Compliment You Should Never Give

“Wow, you look exactly the same.”

Ouch. It’s funny how some of us can be so bad at greeting others. The other day, at a high school reunion, I heard someone ask another, “Oh man, are you still working as a nurse?” and today, I heard someone tell another, “wow, you look exactly the same!”

For some of us, being told that we look the same can be the greatest compliment. It means we haven’t aged or gained weight, more or less the same as before.

But for most of us, it’s less of a compliment because it implies a lack of improvement. And who hasn’t improved or tried to since the last time you’ve met them?

You’ve worked hard at losing weight, yet your friend tells you that you look exactly the same.

You’ve improved you make up and fashion style, yet this person tells you that you look exactly the same.

You’ve straightened your teeth, started a better skin regime, yet this person tells you that you look exactly the same.

Telling someone they look the same could be a compliment, but what if it isn’t? It’s like gifting someone with a basket of crispy tarantulas — sure they might like it, but are you really going to take your chances?

About the author

Jon Lee

I travel the world in search of lessons worth sharing. Addicted to culture shock and transparency. Currently working on heeyy and duuck.

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